It's in the News

I don't like being idle. because the first thing I do when I'm idle is surf the net. And then i eventually end up in web sites that i don't usually frequent. Including sites that keep me up to date on the things that are happening back home. And you know how I feel about the things that happen back home. Sure, a few can bring a smile to my face... but a lot of things just make me sad. A lot of things make me feel ashamed and disappointed. And a lot of things can totally piss me off.

Just browsing through these so called legitimate and professional websites is enough to make one lose his temper. How can you have much respect for these news organizations when they often resort to tabloid journalism. They prefer to sensationalize everything, even the most insignificant things just to gain more attention. They prefer to add melodrama to everything, because that would tug the hearts of most people, and therefore increasing patronage. They have the gall to proclaim that as news organizations, they have no bias--- yet the very first sentence of every article screams bias. Instead of simply telling the news, they insert their own opinions. Some articles even begin with the opinion of the author, instead of presenting the facts first. A lot of these journalists insert adjectives, like how one party is rich while the other is poor, or how one party has a lot of supporters while the other has none, effectively imposing on their target audiences their own bias. Several news reports would focus on sob stories of one party, using all available tools just to elicit more emotion and sympathy from their readers, some extending to several pages without getting the side of the other party. And if they did, the articles about the party that they do not favor would be restricted to several paragraphs, or littered with words that would put them in a negative light. They aim to condition the minds of their readers to feel the same way they do, to empathize with the same people that they feel sympathy for. Some don't even lay out the whole truth, just bits and pieces of it. Then they embellish the article with their own opinions--- just enough to attract attention, yet at times they want it to be downright scandalous. It's the same with the news that they broadcast on TV. It's all about sensationalism so that they can get more attention, so that they can get higher ratings. Who cares if such actions could muddle police work, who cares if they could interfere with the judicial system, who cares if their actions could end up hurting a lot of people? These people claim that it's their duty to tell the news, that they're doing it as service for the people. What a load of bullshit. When things go wrong, they resort to pointing fingers, and they cannot be blamed because they were doing their duty. They act as if they are being oppressed, as if they were victims as well. Boo fuckin' hoo. Forgive me if I have no sympathy for these so called journalists. If they want intelligent people to believe in the things that they are saying, if they want us to believe that it's not all about the money to them, then they better start doing their jobs properly. Enough of sensationalism, bias, and melodrama. They belong in scripted shows on TV, not on the evening news. Opinions and bias should be placed on the opinion pages of newspapers, not on the front page. How can one have much respect for the media when they assume that people want sensationalism and melodrama? And even if the people do, how can one respect an institution that even patronizes and encourages such behavior instead of being a tool for change? How can one have much respect for these institutions when most of their actions reflect the selfish motives beneath that cloak of social service? They have the capability to promote change, they have the capacity to exert great influence, yet they do not choose to use that power properly. Because in the end, it's all about ratings, it's all about money. Anything that can jeopardize their place in the ratings game should not even be attempted. And how can one respect a nation's people when they allow themselves to be used by the media and certain powerful individuals, when they allow their minds to be conditioned in certain ways? How can you have faith in a nation when the majority of its population clamor for brainless, sensationalized and tainted journalism instead of demanding that they get the facts straight without all the embellishment--- without all the added stuffing that only serve to muddle everything? How can one have faith in his people when they let other people dictate beliefs on them, even when they are capable of independent and unbiased thinking? How can one still respect a nation when majority of its population fail to use their gift of logical reasoning because that always let emotions get in the way?

Oh, that's right. I've lost faith and respect for these people a long time ago. And so far, nothing that has happened during the past few months can restore my faith in them again.

...

So why do i still fuckin' care?

Just Deserts

I was surfing the net, reading news from around the world like I always do when I've got nothing better to do. And then I stumbled upon an article, about how Bangkok has gone from its past state of robust economic growth, into its present state of chaos and anarchy.

Looking at the timeline, it's amazing how things could change so much in just a few years. Street demonstrations have become so commonplace, that the whole exercise looks so pathetic and tiresome already. Everyone in the country looks so pathetic. They are not getting any sympathy from the international community. They've become objects of ridicule. Outsiders look at them with amusement, contempt, or disdain.

Rallies are a great way for the people to be heard, but when the people hold such demonstrations that often, with conditions that they wouldn't stop until their demands are met--- they act like spoiled brats, who throw hissy fits with even the slightest provocation whenever they do not get what they want. You don't like the current leader? Demand that he resign. You still don't like his replacement? Let's demand that he resign too. And if you still don't like the one who would replace that replacement? Hey, might as well demand that he step down also.

And that's the thing. They live in a democracy, right? And when they voted for these people in the government, those were the people that majority of the population wanted at that time, right? But when the rotten side of those politicians begin to show, they quickly forget that they are the ones who voted for those politicians in the first place.

These people do not have the right to complain. If things do not turn out the way they have hoped, then they should just DEAL WITH IT. Very few promises ever come true, plans don't always push through, and things rarely turn out the way we hope. Maybe if they used even half of their brains when they voted, maybe things could have turned out better... who knows? To keep on complaining about something that they are partly responsible for is a telltale sign of immaturity. These people should learn to grow up. Sure, things didn't turn out all fine and dandy. Well then, tough luck. They should just take that bitter pill and swallow it, and try to strive for change when the next opportunity comes along--- that is, if they're the type of people who learn from their past mistakes. But for now, they should just learn to live with the repercussions of their stupid decisions. They should take responsibility for their actions. After all, they're not being punished for something that they weren't partially responsible for. They're simply getting exactly what they deserve.

Further Disillusionment

The five stages of grief according to the Kübler-Ross model consists of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and lastly, acceptance. When it comes to politics in this country, the intelligent people have been resigned to that state of acceptance for the longest time. When history has shown that we as a people fail to make the wisest decisions time and time again, those people who use their heads have accepted the fact that as a nation, we will be heading nowhere.

I however, have been trapped in the stages of denial and anger for so long. Maybe it's about time for me to move on. i should no longer be surprised. i should stop being so hopeful because I just end up being so angry and disappointed in the end. I guess it's about time that I accepted the fact that this country is riding on the non stop train to oblivion.

For you to understand why I am so affected, why I seem to care too much when most of my peers choose to be apolitical, you have to understand where these feelings are coming from. Ever since I’ve started this so called career, save for the few months when I’ve worked at a private hospital (where I’ve felt so out of place), I have been working for government institutions. I know how life is for the poorest of our countrymen, how their lives are defined by hopelessness and despair. I’m not like most of my friends who work at private companies, where all they care about is to pass through each they, and get their salaries bimonthly to support their own needs as well as their families. I don’t do all that work for financial needs. I work because I want to help. A lot of times, I’ve used up my monthly salary just to buy things for those patients who lack the means to buy the necessary supplies. Many times I’ve done volunteer work, where I’ve spent long hours seeing patients without any sort of compensation for my services whatsoever--- because I wanted to help. And there’s an incredible lack of manpower because there were very few people like me who wanted to help without asking for anything in return. And with the present state this country is in wherein almost everyone is affected by these hash times, fewer people could even afford to help. I’m not some sheltered prince who’s oblivious to the ways of the real world. I may have been one before, but for the past few years I have been with those people who are neglected, used and trampled upon. I have seen them with my own eyes, I have touched them with my own hands, and I have shared in their pain.

It was sometime last year that I have finally become disillusioned with it all. Every time I complain, every time I would try and gather our collective voices for change, I kept on hearing the same answer. The system has been rotten for years, and there’s nothing I can do about it. If I hate the system so much, all of my superiors would say that I was free to leave and search for my ideal working environment, wherever that may be. At first I was adamant, but inevitably I accepted defeat. There’s no way I can change things, I am just one man. And the fact that everyone seems to be contented with the status quo that they do not even want to exert any effort to try to change things makes it impossible. I have accepted defeat. There’s no way I can help others, when these very people I want to help refuse to help themselves. And it’s even more frustrating when these people who obviously need help refuse to recognize the fact that they need help.

I resent the fact that some people have called me unpatriotic when I’ve made this decision. Excuse me for saying this, but what have these people done for their country? I’m willing to bet that in the few years that I have served my countrymen, I have done more than what most people in this country would do for their nation in their entire lifetime. So excuse me for finally getting fed up with the system. Excuse me for finally giving up. To continue living a life like that where i am experiencing constant strain and frustration would be a little too much for me to handle. To continue living a life like that is bound to kill me.

The result of this year’s elections further vindicates my decision. Can you blame me if I felt that here was one opportunity when we could finally have some changes? Changes that weren’t possible if I tried to do them on my own? That’s why I find the results so frustrating. Here was a glimmer of hope, but it turned out to be nothing but a mirage. Here was another chance to turn things around, and we blew it, yet again. Contrary to what others think, I do not hate specific candidates. I’m not convincing people to vote for a specific candidate either. I just want people to use their heads. That’s it. It’s the way people vote that really pisses me off. They say they think about their decisions, but once you ask them further, they are at a loss for words, which completely negates their statement that they make informed decisions. When asked, may people say one liners, similar to those campaign slogans used by candidates, as if it ends there. They say we should just respect each other’s decisions? Well forgive me for saying this, but just like trust, respect is something you earn, it’s not just given away for free. I may not agree with your choice, but say something that makes sense in defense of your choice and I will respect your choice. I just want to hear something that makes sense so that I may believe that you have made an informed decision. But if you can’t say something sensible to justify your choices, at most I could be civil with your decision. Asking for respect is a little too much.

Some have commented that I was so negative, that I resorted to bashing specific candidates instead of just pointing out the positive traits of my choices to convince others. First of all, I wasn’t trying to entice people to vote the candidates that I preferred. I want to open their eyes, I want them to be open to other possibilities so that they may make informed decisions. And let’s face it. I posted positive things before, and I didn’t get any reaction. but when I started my bashing spree, that’s when people took notice. Some people agreed with me, some people took offense. But hey, I got reactions. That’s one fact of life. Talk to people in a nice manner, and you’d be completely ignored. It would take something extreme to get people’s attention and hopefully knock some sense into them. And hey, I managed to open the eyes of at least three people. And save for the few who blew their top when they ran out of things to say in defense of their candidate, I’ve had several meaningful conversations with some people, I got to hear sensible answers, something that would never have happened if I chose to stay silent.

Some saw me as arrogant. Thinking that I was too stubborn, thinking that I was the only one who was right, and all others were wrong. Some even say that I was so narrow minded. How can I be narrow minded when I reviewed each candidate’s platforms for months, when I kept on watching those debates and discussions again and again so that I can reach a truly informed decision? I doubt if those fanatics ever considered what the other candidates had to say. They are the ones who are narrow minded, and I find it laughable that they would label me as such. They’ve completely bought the marketing strategy of one candidate, that it’s a battle between good and evil, and he alone leads the forces of good, and that he has a monopoly on integrity. I didn’t buy all that bullshit because I know for a fact that other candidates could offer what he’s claiming to offer, plus a whole lot more. And anyone who claims to have analyzed each candidate’s platforms would realize that only two candidates have made promises that they can actually keep. The others just kept on spewing whatever the people want to hear, and no one realizes that all those words are nothing but empty promises. I’m a realist. I’m not a fan of blind faith. Miracles don’t happen everyday after all. I need to look at a candidate’s track record and I need to see if he is capable of doing the things that he says he can do. And to choose the leading candidate is tantamount to giving blind faith. There has to be something that I can hold onto, and he offers absolutely none. This is not a progressive country, and at the depths we’re in now, we can’t afford to keep on praying for miracles, we can’t afford to put our trust on something that isn’t realistic and attainable. As a nation, we can’t afford the luxury of blind faith.

I’m not saddened that one candidate won. I am saddened with the results of the elections as a whole. I thought it was impossible to sink into further depths of disillusionment, but that’s where I am now. I’ve completely lost faith in our people. Just by looking at the winners in most positions, and looking at the runner ups… it only proves that people are still dumb enough to buy all that propaganda. It only shows that people do not learn from the past. One man used to say that our people are worth dying for. I doubt if he would say the same thing now. Would you give up your life for a nation that doesn’t care? Nothing could be more stupid than to give up one’s own life for a nation of imbeciles.

Two of my friends got it right. I asked them why they are supporting a certain candidate, who obviously pales in comparison to all the others. They told me to get real. They pointed out that even though I’m a realist, I kept pinning on the ideal. They pointed out that I am a study in contradiction. If I am really a realist, I should accept the reality--- THAT I LIVE IN A NATION OF MORONS. It’s always about charisma, it’s all about popularity, it’s all about the right kind of propaganda. They turn a blind eye to one of the most qualified candidates because he speaks harsh words, because he speaks the truth. He makes no lofty promises, only those that are attainable, but apparently realistic goals are too boring for most people. He makes no attempt to woo the voters with sweet words because he means business, and because he believed that voters are now mature enough to look past all the fluff of propaganda… and he was so wrong to put that much faith in our people. These people do not want to hear the truth because it is so offensive to them. All prefer to hear what’s nice to hear, no matter how surreal, no matter how absurd. People wouldn’t know what’s good for them even if it’s already right at their faces. The ideal is not an option in a country full of morons. The intelligent people have no choice but to choose the lesser evil, because that's the only choice available, as dictated by the overwhelming moronic majority. When the ideal is not an option, the best that the thinking class can do is to choose the less stupid choice. Those are very harsh words indeed, but I have to agree with my friends. In the case of this pathetic excuse for a nation, nothing hurts as much as the truth.

So I’m sorry for contradicting myself. I apologize for thinking reforms are possible in a country so content to lie down in mud and grime, that any form of change is impossible. By actually thinking we can change things when it is clear that we cannot, I was thinking like most people in this country. By believing in the impossible, I WAS ALSO THINKING LIKE A MORON.

But everyone deserves a chance right? I don’t want this country to sink further into the depths of mediocrity after all… there’s nothing more I can do about it, we should just learn to deal with the repercussions. All I can do this time is hope for the best, and that everyone proves me wrong. But for now, there’s really nothing to hold onto, is there? When all you’ve got are lofty dreams that would need miracles in order to fulfill, I can’t help but feel so pessimistic. In a few years, we will know if our people have finally made the right choice, or made another stupid mistake like they always do. Although most signs point to the latter, anything is still possible. In a few short years, we will all know. But by that time, I wouldn’t even care anymore. I’d be so far away, that I wouldn’t even care whatever happens to this god forsaken country... even if I wanted to.

Public Disservice

Roadwork has started on the northern end of our street last April, and it was nowhere close to being finished. That's why I had to pass through the side streets and take the longer route home for the past few months. They said the old pipes need to be replaced, and since the pipes on our street are located right smack in the middle of the road, they can't do repairs one lane at a time. The entire width of the road has to be smashed up, hence making that section of the street inaccessible to vehicles. I wonder what's taking them so long. Limited supplies? Budgetary constraints? Not enough manpower? Or too much time off for the workers? and I wonder why they have to start doing their repairs at the start of the rainy season. Everything was fine before their work started, we weren't experiencing any problems with water drainage. I wonder if repairs were really needed to be done, or if this was just another opportunity for incumbent politicians to show that the taxpayers' money are working for them since elections are going to be held next year. Heck, ever the cynic, I suspect that this also gives those politicians a chance to siphon more of the tax payers money with their under the table deals with construction companies.

When I got home from work this afternoon, there were a lot of people outside, but i didn't really mind them. I was so tired, and all i wanted to do was lie on my bed and sleep. When i woke up several hours later, I heard the sound of trucks outside. And--- I swore i could have been wrong at first, but i was hearing the sound of jackhammers. I went outside to take a look.

F*ck. Just like that, someone had the bright idea to do roadwork on our part of the street, even when the northern end was far from being finished! Now the entire length of our street was closed! My dad and grandparents were pissed, because apparently we weren't informed beforehand! Even our neighbors weren't informed beforehand, and everyone was angry! My dad and my brother had to park their cars on some side street a mile away, while my car was trapped in our garage. Who wouldn't be pissed? For the next few weeks--- or god forbid, MONTHS, knowing how road work crawls at a snail's pace in this country... I'm back to using public transport. Our other cars would be exposed to possible theft. And then there's my grandmother, who has already been rushed to the hospital several times this year, most often in the middle of the night. How the heck are we supposed to carry her all the way to our car that's parked a mile away and reach the hospital in time when the road outside our house resembles a demolition site?! At its present state, it looks as if an atomic exploded!

My dad has talked to the mayor (who's my grandfather's friend), and he said roadwork would be done in a few days. It's possible--- on another city, roadwork was done in only two days... but then again, the house of the mayor's mother was on that street. The same thing cannot be said with regard to the other streets in this country though. That's too bad, because having VIPs within the vicinity seems to be the only way to make people work both quickly and efficiently. A little over a week, let's see. That's what the mayor said. We're just hoping nothing bad happens within the next few days... nothing emergent, nothing critical. No life or death situation. because if something does happen, you can bet on it... our family will SURELY raise HELL.

Neutered

Where i used to work, I used to complain that there was a severe lack of essential supplies. We ran out of essential drugs. We ran out of intravenous fluids. Reagents for several essential laboratory exams are sporadic. The list goes on and on. And I always complained how the whole system sucks, how the whole system was so rotten.

I never thought that I had it so much better back then.

Frustration. I want to be able to do something... I want to help... but I just can't--- because certain circumstances wouldn't allow.

I've been working simultaneously in a private hospital and a public hospital for a few months now. I don't know which is more frustrating--- Not being able to treat patients because they couldn't afford the high fees that they have to cough up up front before they could be treated, or not being able to treat patients because you don't have the needs to properly attend to them.

The essential stuff are rarely available. We rarely have sterile gauzes available. We don't even have unsterile ones. Can you imagine the scenario when trauma patients come in profusely bleeding, and we have no gauze to apply on the wounds for immediate hemostasis? We have to ask their companions to buy supplies at the nearest drug store! The intravenous fluid of choice for trauma patients is also not available. And speaking of laboratory exams, one night there was none available. X-rays? Many times we couldn't even x-ray our patients because they ran out of films. Empirical treatment becomes the rule, we treat our patients even when we do not know what their ailments are exactly. The hospital where I used to work had a budget provided by the national government, hence they had more funds for supplies. Now I work for a hospital with funds provided by the local municipality only, hence the bare bones supplies--- and the word BARE is an understatement. I often wonder why they don't just close down the whole damn place if they couldn't provide adequate health care.

And speaking of rotten systems? Apparently I was wrong for thinking the the system in the place where I used to work was the most inefficient. I was wrong. Sure there's the whole bureaucracy, red tape, and occupational blackmail and threats rampant in any government institution... but everything is magnified in an institution with a lesser budget. I don't know how having lesser funds can lead to an increase in inefficiency when creating a system only entails effective communication between human beings. And it's not like those employees have a right to complain about their salaries, making their wages as excuses to slack off--- their salaries are actually at par with employees at other hospitals, even private ones. I could go on and on about how everything is inefficient, but what really pisses me of is the way the hospital handles OBgyne patients.

It is the only hospital that I know where Obgyne patients do not head straight to the Obgyne department for examination. They head straight to the emergency room together with medical, surgical, and pediatric patients. Patients with gynecological complaints are tolerable... but obstetric patients do not have a place in the emergency room! Why is that, you ask? It's fine when we only have to do initial examinations... but obstetric patients need continuous monitoring, something that we could not afford to do in the emergency room! For crying out loud, that's what labor rooms are for! Last week there was an incident when one obstetric patient had to wait at the emergency room for 2 whole hours while her husband was completing the needs for operation, because they have this STUPID policy that patients cannot be brought up to the labor room until they've bought all the needed supplies. That means that if the patient's cervix suddenly becomes fully dilated, she has to give birth at the ER. How stupid is that?! The emergency room also has no supplies available, wouldn't it be better if the patient gives birth in the operating room where the environment is sterile rather than giving birth at the ER since we have no supplies also?!

The end result, the baby was dead upon delivery. And the pediatric resident upstairs called us, saying that we were also partly to blame because we didn't monitor the fetal heart rate regularly. I was trying very hard to keep myself from shouting at her. We had so many patients that time, no one had the time to check on their patients regularly! Even the nurses had their hands full! That's why OB patients should be brought straight to the Labor room since there are people there who could check on them regularly! Let those patients wait for the required supplies there!

What takes the cake is how most of the Ob residents talk to ER residents as if they're already consultants. Granted, some are already finished with residency training, but at that hospital, they are still employed as residents making us equals. They have no right to act so superior and treat us like losers. They're already finished with residency yet they have to take jobs as residents because they have no patients in their private practice? They are the losers, not us! Some even call us, in the midst of the melee in the ER, scolding us about certain erroneous orders we've made. If they have a problem with the orders, they should just correct them themselves! The patients are already upstairs, they should be the ones to call the attending physicians! And don't they dare complain about their work load. We know how much work they are doing and we know they are just sleeping upstairs during the wee hours of the morning because all their patients have to go through us! We are lucky to get two hours of sleep because patients continuously arrive in the emergency room, even for the most stupid and unnecessary reasons! Sometimes I feel the urge to define the word EMERGENCY to each of these patients!

The whole system is typical for every public hospital, and the lack of supplies can make everyone conclude that it is a public hospital--- but that hospital seems to be more of a private hospital in the guise of public hospital. In truth, it is a death trap. Sure, there's a huge discount for the residents of the municipality, but that doesn't include ER consults. They even charge a huge amount for professional fees, even if we barely do anything. Drugs are even cheaper outside. The tetanus vaccine alone costs more than three times the amount sold in drug stores! That's highway robbery! What makes it worse is the fact that most of the patients seeking consult don't have much money to begin with, that's why they seek consult at a "public" hospital. It's like robbing from the poor, taking away what little they have left. And they are "imprisoned" in the waiting area until they could settle their bills, a practice that I thought was already illegal these days.

Many times I'm tempted to just pay for their needs, pay for a portion of their bills, give a little cash so I could help... but I've learned that such a practice opens up a can of worms. Once I start giving money to one patient, I have to give money to all the other patients because word gets around--- fast. Besides, I've been doing that practice for most of the past year, at times because I was forced and required to, but many times because i wanted to. It's about time I spend some of the money I earn for myself. Even if I wanted to help, the bills that they accumulate seem pretty high even for me. Gone are the days when I could spend half of my salary on one patient alone and not care at all afterwards. Before, my parents still gave me an allowance, this year I'm on my own. I couldn't afford to be as helpful and giving as I was back then.

After each tour of duty, I have time to reflect during the long ride home. You really do see how fucked up this country is just by looking at the health care system. In this country, health care is a privilege, not a right. The poor have no right to get sick, because when they do they have very little to turn to. When they get sick or when they have an accident, it's as if they're already counting the hours until their death. It's as if they already died. The government labels trivial matters as their priority. They are blind to the necessities. I can only imagine how detached they are, how insensitive they are to the needs of the very people that they are supposed to be serving.

Con Ass

Con Ass. That's what they are calling it. i couldn't think of an even better term to describe the new constitution that a lot of our politicians--- and not what our people, have been clamoring for. Sure, it really stands for Constitutional Assembly, being the means to carry out the changes in the constitution that they have been fighting for... changes that they claim will be for the good of the entire nation. But it's more fitting when they keep it short, when they stick to the abbreviation. Then we can interpret Con ass as Constitution by Assh*les--- because when we isolate it from all the noise, all the bells and whistles and get down to the gist, to the core of the situation, we can see that that's what it really is. If they succeed, we're going to have a constitution made by assh*les, those self serving politicians who have the nerve to call what they're doing as being good for the country, when in truth all their actions are for the good of themselves only. One of those A-holes was even interviewed yesterday, when the news about how the supreme court rejected their previous proposal to ammend the constitution came out. He said they will continue the fight for it is for the good of the country. and i quote: "this issue should not be decided by what is popular, instead we have to take the side of what is right." er--- is he fuck*ng delusional?! or just plain stupid?! or most likely, as with majority of politicians, simply thick skinned? for one thing, with the majority of politicians pushing for charter change, what they're doing is the popular thing to do--- at least when it comes to politicians. And he says what they're doing is right?! since when did matters of self interest become the right thing to do for politicians? just because it's so commonplace that it has become the standard doesn't make it right. Shouldn't his statements come from those in the other side, those few remaining idealistic, selfless politicians who can see through the motives of majority of their colleagues, and therefore fight against charter change?

These people are giving me a splitting headache. If I was even mildly concerned with my health, it would do me good to avoid watching the news and reading newspapers. What the hell is wrong with all these people?!

CON ASS indeed.

Our Rotten Political System

I used to have a great interest in politics. Back in college when i ran for a position in the student council, all those talk about national issues perked my interest. I became so involved that all the news about politicians, how they're doing everything wrong, gave me such huge headaches. When I entered med school, my interest waned--- probably because of all the studying (yeah right!) that i had to do... but mostly because my new set of peers had little interest in the topic. How could I maintain interest when I had no one to discuss such topics with? That was a blessing in disguise though. With the way politicians have been running the country, my headaches would have probably become worse. Thankfully, I've been almost headache free for 5 years now--- free from headaches you get from politics.

Now that I've been basically a bum, I had time to really read newspapers again--- the way I used to, right down to the editorials. And I had time to watch the news again, and see what's up with the country. Politicians are still the same. Come to think of it, the political situation in this country seems to have gotten worse. Politicians are so full of sh*t. never have I seen such individuals who are driven by selfish motives. It seems that their every action is carried out with such careful planning and with such precision, to reach the ultimate goal of personal gain. i'm aware that not all politicians are like that. Following the rule of probabilities, then there has to be a few decent politicians--- I just can't see any of them. I used to know one decent politician, but he died of an incurable illness a few years back. That's funny. There we had one decent politician, yet the Lord took him away, leaving us with the scums. Maybe politicians are meant to be scums--- try to be the exception, and you're eliminated from the game.

What makes their selfish motives even harder to swallow, is the fact that politicians, by definition, are meant to serve others, and not their own selves! Here they are acting like kings, like they own the streets they walk in, expecting all of us common folk to bow before them, to praise them, to serve them. Ideally, they should be the ones serving us! I remember one time, when I was stuck in a traffic jam, and this politician's vehicle was bullying its way through the traffic, complete with sirens and motorcycle escorts, expecting us common folk to give way to them. A lot of vehicles did give way to them, but not me! So what if he's a politician?! that doesn't make him king! That doesn't mean we should all give way for him! That doesn't give him the right to be ahead of us! I don't care if he was late for a meeting or something, I also had plans that afternoon. He should stay stuck and wait in the traffic like the rest of us. Then one of the motorcycles stopped beside the driver's side of my car, the escort giving me a dagger look. I didn't care, I wasn't going to give up my place, I wasn't going to give way. Maybe if it was an ambulance, or if there was an emergency. I won't give way to a scummy politician. The way he's lording over the roads is proof enough that he's scum. I just gave his escort a dagger look back.

I cannot think of a far greater worse disservice to mankind, than to be something that is the complete opposite of what you should be. I think a lot a new politicians out there are decent... most fresh graduates from universities are idealistic. They want to change the rotten system. They want to make things right. But eventually, the temptation may be too great to resist--- they eventually get swallowed up by the rotten system. They become one of those people they used to despise, they become one of those they wanted to change.

So what's new with the world of politics lately? All the commotion about charter change nauseates me. Especially the scum that we refer to as the speaker of the house. I agree that the constitution should be overhauled--- it's dated, and it has a lot of provisions that seem to be contrasting... probably because it was rushed, in a way. But it shouldn't be changed when selfish motives are the ones that are prioritized. Does he really think that the people in this country cannot see his selfish motives? He knows that he is unpopular with the masses, so he want to change the charter so that he can run for the position of prime minister. It's so evident, that he seems like such a big liar as he denies this. With the way he managed to manipulate the men and women of congress, like blind, stupid, brainless followers--- he will surely win. But he knows that people won't listen to anything he has to offer because they can see through him, so he brings out all these arguments to make charter change pleasing to the eye. He mentions progressive, first world countries who have a parliamentary form of government, and argues that they are progressive because of their form of government. He must really think we are stupid. Is he aware of those many poor nations who have a parliamentary form of government? is he aware of those progressive nations who maintain a presidential form of government? i cannot believe he had the guts to say something like that on the radio and on national TV! Either he's a big moron, or he's an incredibly scheming, devious prick. I believe he's the latter. I know this will sound really mean, but maybe the Lord took his daughter away because no good person deserves to have such scum for a parent.

Somehow, i am thankful that I am not a son of a politician. Others are not as lucky. Who can forget that senator who sounds like a lunatic. She's not only crazy, she's also a liar. She lies for self gain, which is something politicians aim for. One time she said she would jump off a plane,, or have herself shot by a firing squad, if this or that happened. She would've been declared a hero if she fulfilled her promises, the country would've thanked her for ridding itself of a politican like her. But what i cannot stomach was how she swore by her son's grave, her son who had just commited suicide at that time, that she will never run for politics again. And Lo and Behold-- come election time, she was one of the most prominent candidates. What kind of person would stoop down to such a level of lying? What kind of people are we choosing as leaders of our country?

And as for the most prominent liar of all, the exalted president of our nation? I never liked her, even from the very start of her political career. It was evident from the very beginning that she's an opportunist, i wonder how many people fail to see that. She goes with the good, and always leaves the bad, even if she has sucked the bad ones dry once upon a time. The epitome of what you would call user friendly. fair weathered friend. And her showbiz antics are sickening. Everything about her seems to be an act, you'd have to wonder what her real face looks like. And I know for a fact that she's corrupt... all those nasty rumors are true. The whole family is corrupt. And yet our people tolerate such a leader. Maybe we really are stupid. I for one, would want a leader I can be proud of, and not one I am ashamed of. The only instance when I did like her was when she promised not to run for presidency because she was the source of the countries divisiveness--- which was the truth. And I admired her for saying the truth, because it is very rare to hear some form of truth from a politician. But of course, she showed her true form again and turned her back on her promise. She lied. Funny how this country can tolerate such big liars. When the country had its national election a few years back, I know some people who voted for her though they didn't like her. Their defense was they were choosing between two evils. If I had to choose between the two presidential candidates, I would've chosen the one who was inexperienced with no proof of corruption than the one who had a lot of experiences, especially when it comes to corruption. For me, the inexperienced one is the lesser evil. But then, that's just me. I had to point out that there were other options. We didn't have to choose between two evils because there were other presidential candidates. They said they still won't vote for them because they had no chance of winning. Who decides who has a chance of winning anyway? The chance of winning is just a stupid perception given by press releases and promotional blitz. If the number of people who gave such reasoning voted for one of the decent candidates, then that candidate would've had a shot at winning. I know of a few people who genuinely liked her--- something i don't understand. They're intelligent people, yet they are blind to her ways. Maybe intelligence is relative. Just because you're intelligent in some aspects, doesn't make you intelligent in all others. And I wonder how we continue to tolerate such a leader, with all the negative news about her that are being exposed. In the past, we didn't tolerate such leaders, what makes it diferent now? Is it because there's no better option? That's stupid. With the huge population in this country, there are sure to be a lot of people who are better than her. Have we simply become tired? Have we suffered from too much fatigue that we now refuse to fight? If that's the case, then we deserve to have such lousy leaders.

I can never understand what goes on in the minds of voters. Sometimes, our votes make sense, and sometimes they don't. What's with the predilection for voting showbiz personalities even if they clearly can't do anything for us in the realm of politics? Are we that blind? can't we distinguish from those who can genuinely serve us from those who are just pretending to serve us? Can't we make intelligent decisions? We vote for those who have fame or fortune. We let the media do the voting for us. We choose those who's names are more familiar, we choose those who are featured more prominently on newspapers, on TV... can't we make intelligent decisions on our own? Even in my home town, politicians smell like rotten fish. The microsystem indeed mimics the macrosystem. We've had the same mayor for years. He never does anything productive, and evidently he's corrupt---yet the people keep on voting for him, despite the better alternatives who are pitted against him! Even in the smallest political units, dynasties are made, continuous support are given to those who do nothing, to those who abuse their power, and such support is extended to their kin. Why is it that most of us patronize familiarity even when it becomes rotten, and we are adamant when it comes to change? Even with signs of wear and tear, we tolerate things that are familiar, and we only throw them away when they are damaged beyond repair. Is it because of sentimentality? When our progress is at stake, we have no room for sentimentality, familiarity, nor convenience. Our inaction is viewed as support. Our silence is misinterpreted as content. From the highest position in the land, to the lowest level in politics, everything is rotten. The whole political system is rotten. Change is needed, and I'm not just talking about charter change here. No good will come out of changing the charter if the individuals running our country aren't changed. On a national level, drastic changes are being forced, and such changes can affect us all. We cannot stay aloof while these so called leaders proceed with their dirty business. If we allow these selfish individuals to do whatever they want for self gain, if we still remained silent in these turbulent times, then I would have lost all hope in this country. I would have given up on our people. A few years ago, I was contemplating going abroad because the country seemed to be going nowhere, and the inaction of its citizens further aggravated the problem. Thankfully, something woke them up, and that restored my faith in this nation. I wonder what it would take to wake us up this time.

There can never be progress unless reforms are made. SOme say the system has become too rotten, that change is impossible. Who's fault is it anyway, that the system has become too rotten? Isn't it ours? because we remained silent even as these individuals vandalize the once sacred institution that is our govenment? Reforms are possible. Drastic reforms may be too much to ask, but we can start with small reforms. Those minor reforms add up to major reforms. Even one idealistic individual can start by making that one small step. Our goals can be met as long as we all make small steps, as long as we follow that one individual clamoring for reforms. After all, we all want reforms, don't we? If I am mistaken, then all is lost. What i fear may be true, there may be no hope for this country. We will all rot with the stupid system.

If we remain indifferent and aloof in a time when action is needed, then maybe we deserve to have such stupid and selfish leaders. They are the personification of the punishment that we rightfully deserve.

It is time for us to wake up.