Gunning For Gluttony

So we were having a family dinner at a restaurant earlier today. We brought our grandmother with us, she's finally strong enough again and able to walk short distances. As usual, a lot of food were ordered, a lot of them high in salt, high in fat, plus a bunch of those that are high in sugar for dessert--- yup, all things that are not supposed to be eaten by my grandmother. She ordered a separate meal for herself, a bland diet that would finally make her doctor proud. I guess the fact that her last stay at the hospital was such a close call finally got to her. Whereas before she would order anything she wanted--- all those that are high in salt, high in fat, high in sugar... even blurting out lines such as, "just kill me if you won't allow me to eat what I want!!!"... this time she was obeying her doctor's orders. I actually found it amusing. I can no longer count the times when I caught her eating something that she wasn't supposed to be eating, only putting on a smile as she held onto the food on her mouth, like a child who was caught doing something he or she was not allowed to. I can no longer count the times I've found a hidden stash of junk food in her room--- under her bed, in her closet, wherever. She was every doctor's nightmare--- the type of patient who is a high risk for everything, and yet refused to comply with the doctor's orders. She was so stubborn, saying she'd rather die than to live like a prisoner, and yet when she experiences her usual bouts of dizziness, chills, and difficulty of breathing, she looks so helpless, begging for immediate rescue from everyone. She says she'd rather die as long as she's able to do what she wants, yet in those moments of weakness, it's so obvious that she desperately wants to cling on to life. At those times, I always have the urge to ignore her for even a few minutes just to teach her a lesson. Nothing seemed to make her realize that she needs to change her lifestyle, not even those repeated confinements at the hospital. But miraculously, this time, it seems that she has finally had an awakening.

Then our food was served. Without warning, my dad put several servings of all that high in salt, high in fat food on my grandmother's plate. I gave him THAT look. He asked me what's the problem. He said it was the holidays so it's okay to veer from one's diet. What a stupid excuse--- the type of excuse you'd expect from hard headed patients and their incredibly stubborn families. Then he said he was only giving her small servings. SMALL SERVINGS?! I wouldn't call that small servings, he gave her more than what my sisters were eating! As for my grandmother? I thought she finally learned her lesson... and yet she ate EVERYTHING.

Geez, the next time she goes into another one of those attacks, don't they dare ask me again what's causing it. She's causing her own problems, and the family is aggravating matters by patronizing her. It's a vicious cycle that would go on and on until the final days of her life.