Butterflies in my Stomach

I haven't felt this way for a very long time. It was the same feeling that I used to feel when I have to perform alone in front of a large audience... to act, to sing, or deliver a speech. Or when I was a contestant in one of those quiz bowls and I felt so conscious because everyone would see me fail miserably... which was often the case because I gave in to pressure. The pressure was too great. Stage fright. I wanted to back out, but I knew that I can't.

I've been aloof and indifferent for the past few months when everyone seems to be panicking already. But just now, I suddenly feel queasy. nauseous. I have butterflies in my stomach. I seem to be on the brink of stress incontinence too. This feeling was all too familiar, though it wasn't since high school when I last felt this way.

After more than two months of studying, I have finished. It seems that I'm not used to studying anymore, since I've been moving at a snail's pace... but I have to study everything again, briskly this time, since i seem to have forgotten a lot of those things that I have studied. This is incredibly frustrating. And to make matters worse, I only have five days--- ONLY 5 DAYS(!!!!) left for review, and I can say that I have never been more unprepared for an exam in my whole life. Those who have taken the exam say that one can never be really prepared for that exam, that you can't really study for it, you won't find the answers in the reviewers, that it all boils down to luck and prayer. They say that for comfort, i guess. but it's making me panic instead of easing my nerves.

The pressure is so great, I don't think I can bear not passing the exam.I hope when I update my blog 2 weeks from now, when the results finally come out, I'll get to post something positive.