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It was easy to dismiss this show as a teeny bopper show that was just trying to be edgy. Heck, the casting of the two male leads was obviously to entice a female audience to watch this show. Plus, it's shown on the CW network--- the home of cheesefests such as Smallville, Charmed, Gilmore Girls, Gossip Girl, the newly unearthed 90210, plus a whole lot of others. Could you blame me for initially thinking that this show was like all those other shows?
Good thing I'm a sucker for any show dealing with demons, monsters, and the like. Good thing I'm a sucker for a good scare. Good thing I'm a sucker for any show that has a lot of blood and gore. And I have to admit, there's been a huge hole in my heart ever since Buffy The Vampire Slayer went off the air, and no TV show, no matter how gory or campy, could seem to fill it. So yeah, I began watching Supernatural on its 3rd season. And I liked what I've seen so much, that I had to buy the first two seasons immediately. Oh Yeah, there was THAT sense of urgency. I admit, the first season seemed a bit teeny bopperish, but it had that edge that didn't feel pretentious at all. It really felt genuine. Case in point, that episode with the painting (episode 19) was genuinely scary. Unlike the other shows in the CW network, Supernatural sticks out like a sore thumb because the show was meant to be taken seriously even if it dealt with subjects matters that were more of within the realm of fantasy. And with each succeeding season, the special effects became better, the episodes became bloodier, and most importantly, the story arcs grew darker and more sinister--- you wouldn't care anymore even if their initial target audience consisted of shrieking females aged 13-20 who were looking for something to fill up that void left by Charmed. I thought the story arc in the protracted third season was great... but from what I've seen with the first few episodes this season... with the grand battle between good and evil looming... the direction in which the series is going seems to be nothing short of phenomenal. Angels walking among us- the grand coming of Lucifer kind of phenomenal... those are big words coming from someone who's agnostic. Supernatural is definitely one of the best shows this season, and I'd definitely recommend it to anyone--- fans of horror and fantasy, teeny boppers looking for a good scare, emo kids and goths looking for dark materials, peers looking for something to watch on DVD this Halloween...
like I said, anyone. :)
I mentioned before that i applied for the straight fellowship program in thoracic and cardiovascular surgery (TCVS)--- that means I only have to take up general surgery for 3 years instead of the usual 5 years, then I could proceed to fellowship training which would last for another three years. To give us a glimpse of our possible life for the next six years, pre-residency this time around had me rotating in general surgery for two weeks, while the latter half would have me rotating in TCVS.I've been rotating in TCVS for about a week now, and I just have to say that the difference between general surgery and any sub specialty (TCVS, urology, plastic surgery) is like night and day. Everything is organized--- it's possible in general surgery, and I kept on wondering why they can't seem to fix things. In terms of schedule? I couldn't be more happier. I can squeeze a few hours of sleep even when I'm on duty. I can go home every three days. During week days, i can go home as early as 7 PM. I had time to go to the gym. On weekends, we're done by 11 AM! And today, I'm on call, yet I've managed to go to the mall and buy a few clothes, watch a movie, and eat a decent meal... I even went to a bar a few hours ago! LOL. Good thing there were no emergency cases. I was back in the hospital just in time to log in. :)Come to think of it, going back at the same hospital isn't so bad--- as long as I'll be going back under the TCVS program. I'm familiar with everything already, I already know a lot of people here, asking for favors would be much easier... during the first two weeks while I was still in general surgery, I immediately remembered why I left this place... seeing all the things I hated--- things haven't improved... in some aspect, they have worsened. But in TCVS--- I believe I could live like this. Yeah, I would still have to go through three years of no life in general surgery, for three whole years this hospital would swallow my entire life again... but after that, it would be three years of getting my life back, with the added bonus of surgical training. I guess that's a fair exchange. :)Yeah there are drawbacks... they say it would be better to finish general surgery first so i would be board certified to handle cases in both general surgery and TCVS... they say I would be more capable to handle intra-abdominal lesions if i finish general surgery first... add the fact that several hospitals prefer those who finished general surgery compared to those who underwent the straight program... but i'm tired of the whole general surgery lifestyle--- at least in this hospital. I guess all this though is a bit presumptive, i haven't been accepted yet. LOL. If I don't get accepted, I'll be given the option to undergo general surgery instead--- an option I won't take, even if I said during the interview that I would be willing to. If I'm not accepted, that would be fine with me. It's not something that would bring me down. That just opens the door for other opportunities to explore, opportunities that would arguably be better. I love helping others, it's just that I'm sick of giving up my entire being just so I could be of service. This time, I'd like to leave a little piece of my life for my own. That's not too much to ask for, right?
It's day 12 of this replay of pre residency training, and things are getting crazier and crazier. Tension has been escalating exponentially, and the so called seniors are making things harder and harder. One of the things that i don't understand is that we have to sign in for attendance at exactly 4 AM each day, even though we're at the hospital all the time. Thrice my name was already crossed out. I wouldn't mind it if I came from home and was really late. Heck, I wouldn't really mind it even if I was at the hospital and failed to sign because I fell asleep. But during all three instances, I was at the hospital working! and it's not like I was really late in signing. It was only 4:15 AM when I went up to the surgery lounge to sign in a few minutes ago, and they already crossed out a lot of our names!
That's it. I don't care about that stupid "attendance" sheet anymore. It has turned into nothing but bull--- another tool to whet the appetites of the power hungry. If they want us to drop everything we're doing no matter how important it is, even if doing so would be detrimental to our patients... just to be able to sign on some stupid piece of paper, then so be it. If they're seriously considering using that stupid attendance sheet as a criteria to determine the people who would get accepted in the department of surge-fuckin'-ry, then they have more than a few screws loose. It's just another proof that the way they run this so called pre residency training is so fucked up. They can cross out my name for the next two weeks for all I care. In my heart I am doing my work.I am not slacking off in any way. If they will base my performance on the number of signatures on that attendance sheet, then that's their call. I don't care at all.
Pre residency training redux.
Prison Break fans could relate... Remember how it was in the end of the second season two of prison break, when Michael Scofield found himself in prison again after a tumultuous turn of events? That's exactly how I felt the very moment I reported for duty a week ago, at 4 AM, in the place where I used to work. A slightly different program, but in the exact same department, in the exact same hospital where I submitted my resignation papers more than a year ago. Back to the no eating for a maximum of 2 days, no sleeping for a maximum of three days, no taking a bath for a maximum of a week lifestyle. In a way it's easier the second time around. I already know the ins and outs, I already know the rotten system and the ways to get around it. Plus, the first year residents seem to find it awkward giving me orders, because they know for a fact that if I had not resigned, I would've been their senior. So yeah, work wise, there's less stress involved. But a lot of my seniors have been giving me a very hard time. Clearly, a number of them do not want me back, and some aren't even blunt about it. I'm somewhat ostracized. I feel like an outsider more than ever. Some people who I've used to think as friends now seem like strangers--- as if the months I've spent with them, sharing their work, their problems, their pain... as if those months never even happened. And add the fact that when I did this the first time, I was having fun even though the work load was unphysiologic, because I liked what I'm doing. Now everything's a chore. I even find the whole exercise useless. Pre residency training is meant to orient incoming residents regarding the ins and outs of the system. Geez, technically I've already had more than 8 months of orientation last year. I'm not learning anything new. I even know a lot more than the current first year residents. Not to mention the fact that I can operate on a patient a lot faster. Many times I was tempted to just grab the instruments just to get things done.Crap. The next 5-6 years of my life trapped in that place. There'd be little time for anything else, because in order to work in the place,you'd have to allow the system to swallow your entire being. But i guess after 5-6 years, i'd finally be able to do what I like, right? Rewards are directly proportionate to the sacrifices we make... at least I hope so.
One person seems to be really happy about all this though--- that's one positive thing I could see. My credit card bills have miraculously been paid, and when I got home this evening, a gourmet meal was waiting for me, prepared by you know who.
It was easy to dismiss this show as a teeny bopper show that was just trying to be edgy. Heck, the casting of the two male leads was obviously to entice a female audience to watch this show. Plus, it's shown on the CW network--- the home of cheesefests such as Smallville, Charmed, Gilmore Girls, Gossip Girl, the newly unearthed 90210, plus a whole lot of others. Could you blame me for initially thinking that this show was like all those other shows?
